Mutual Admiration
In Will Carlin’s recent piece about Mark Talbott (“Dinner at Eight”), his excellent observation about players of all three squash disciplines harmoniously and mutually-respectfully mingling in Grand Central that night may have been the most remarkable dynamic of the entire evening—the undercurrent of competitive tension that has always attended encounters between advocates/practitioners of those three games was noticeably absent that night, and I am still unsure as to why.
Maybe it was due to it being the kick-off to a softball event, hence confirmation that softball “won”; maybe it was personalities like Mark’s which kind of superceded everything else and shamed everyone into putting their differences aside; maybe it was that most of us are middle-aged by now and have “grown up” and even to some extent mellowed. None of those really feel like the right explanation, but it was definitely something I was acutely aware of, and I was glad to see that someone else felt it, too.
Rob Dinerman
I enjoyed Will Carlin’s tribute to Mark Talbott (“Dinner at Eight”). In my squash career, the toughest match I ever played was a doubles match against Mark and Peter Briggs in the semis of the North American Open. I was playing with Brad Desaulniers, and the match lasted for two hours and 45 min. We lost 15-12 in the fifth. I can’t help but wonder how many players say that the toughest match they ever played was against Mark Talbott. And how few of us won.
Larry Heath
I enjoyed Will Carlin’s recent article about Mark Talbott (“Dinner at Eight”). After leaving Trinity, Mark actually spent the majority of his time in Toronto training with Murray Lilley, me and other softball disciples. He did indeed go to South Africa, but he really cut his teeth on softball in Toronto. Keep up the good work.
Doug Whittaker
Hard Lessons
I felt bad for Carlin (”Snapped”). He screwed up, and he recognized it PDQ. We all make mistakes; it’s part of being human. I hope he doesn’t beat himself up too badly about it. You learn your lesson and you move on. Even former national champions misbehave once in a blue moon. His body of work in squash has been very good. One misstep shouldn’t soil his otherwise very good reputation.
Gaetano P. Cipriano, P.E
Reading Will Carlin’s piece (”Snapped”) was a powerful reminder of the mental edge it takes to consistently win at anything, not just squash. Focus, as well as footwork and technique, requires a clear head and a discipline to do the right thing in each situation, no matter how dire the circumstance. Will did us all a service by reminding us this lesson, and to confess his transgression on the court publicly in print shows he is well on his way back to his former high standard.
Guy DeFeis
Wellesley, MA
Wow. Will Carlin’s column (“Snapped”) was very intense and I applaud his bravery and candor for speaking so openly about what I know is not one of his finer moments. But I think his column is extremely valuable and I hope that the entire junior tournament crowd, player and parent alike, reads it. His story reminds us how difficult it is to control powerful emotions like aggression and fear and how quickly and easily those emotions distort reality when we are listening to them rather than being in the moment. More significantly, Will’s story gives an excellent picture how performance can so quickly deteriorate: powerful, uncontrolled emotions, negative self-talk, poor conduct, lost match. Poor conduct is always the sign of a negative interior state and that’s only one of the reasons that we stress sportsmanship. Good sportsmanship usually corresponds to better play and players, parents and coaches should do everything in their power to reinforce that message.
Finally, I’d like to say that while we all strive for good conduct, we all understand Will’s predicament because we’ve all lost the battle over our emotions in one form or another while on court. In this regard, while holding ourselves and each other to high standards, we should practice compassion when actions fall short of expectations. We are not looking for Utopia, but a clean, fair outcome and a universe that will call us out when our conduct falters, knowing we can do better.
Matthew A. Munich
Associate Director of Junior Conduct and Refereeing, US Squash
One of the beautiful things about sports of all kinds is the raw, unfettered emotion that comes pouring out of those who play them. When it’s pure ecstasy from miraculous wins, we spontaneously join them in the revelry. In mainstream sports, those moments are captured on video and forever burned into our memories on SportsCenter (like Brandi Chastain celebrating the World Cup winning goal in Los Angeles in 1999).
But when we see appalling behaviour, we shake our heads and go on criticizing the transgressor until that person has been so beaten down that he goes on living in infamy—except when the offendor has the courage to stand up and apologize with the sincerity that we can all feel.
I’d say Will Carlin has done all of that and more. And I applaud him.
Don Burdick
via email
